I was watching SNL Saturday night particularly the Weekend Update with Amy & Seth. Ugh, I just had to use Amy’s quote the whole day through Earth Day.
It went something to this effect:
“It’s Earth Day, so SUCK IT NEPTUNE!
Yeah, it got old fast, but I still loved saying it to everyone.
My friend just moved into a new place with a new roommate. So I came over for the first time. Her roommate was out for the town, so there was no one else there. So I walk into the kitchen, and I see a crate full of rocks.
Me: Um, what’s in this crate?
Friend: Rocks.
Me: For what?
Friend: Oh, my roommate, she collects rocks that she thinks emits special energy.
Me: Um, WTF?!
My friends and I were going hang out for the night. And they were going to go out to eat first. Then I get a phone call later on that we were going to go out to eat. So I’m like “That’s fine.” So I hurry up, eat, get ready and what not. So they pick me up, and they are like “Ok, let’s go to Red Robins to eat.” I’m like “Oh, I just ate. Doesn’t matter.”
I’ve never been there, so I didn’t know what to expect. So we get there, and it’s busy as fuck. We sit down and order, and this kid takes our orders. You could tell he was the type who got picked on a lot and isn’t a pro at the social aspect needed for the job. He was overly outgoing and seemed a little out of his comfort zone, cause he stuttered a bit. Cause if you haven’t been to Red Robins, you basically need to have the biggest outgoing personality ever. So he gets to me, and I tell him I’m not having anything. Then he’s like “No wonder why you’re so skinny, you don’t eat.” “Hardy har har.” I just nod and smile. What I really want to say is “Fuck off.”
So then every ones food comes to the table and is brought by a another guy who is probably around my age, early 20s. He hands out the last plate and notices I didn’t get anything. He asks me, if I had ordered anything, and I told him “No.”. So then he’s like “The food is so great. Sucks to be you!” I just politely nod. I really wanted to say: “Get the fuck out my face you asshat prick!”
After he left, my one friend noticed that I was getting the beat down here. “Wow, they are really giving it to you.” I’m like “Yeah.” *sigh*
I think I pretty much hate Red Robins. I get a complex every time I drive past the place now. I know it’s weird. It’s all just really dumb how fake these people have to act. I know were to go now, if I want to be belittled.
I found this somewhat humorous this morning. Most of my commute to school is on the expressway. I’m driving, and I see about eight people on the overpass standing above the expressway, each one holding a sign that says a word. The funny thing was, this was at around 7:45a in the morning with the sun raising behind them, so you couldn’t read what the heck their signs said. I’m sure it was something about the icy bridges ahead or something.
It’s early in the morning at school. The hall is filled with a shitload of people. I’m walking down the hallway and approaching the corner that I need to turn. So I have my eyes on the corner, and this girl catches my eye. I was positive it was someone I knew from high school. She already made eye contact with me. I’m so blind without my nerdy glasses on that I was staring at her stalker like as I approached closer and closer. So she started to smile at me. I was sure it was this girl I knew. So I get within 5 feet of her, cause I was going to say “Hi”, and I walk straight to her and notice right away that wasn’t who I thought it was. Thank goodness it wasn’t the girl, cause she’s major bitch, who’s fake.
So I’m staring as I walk by, but I realized that I probably was staring at this girl like I had seen a ghost. But what made it weird and embarrassing, after I had passed, her friend and the girl started to laugh…. at…. me…..
Boohoo.
So if you’re avoiding wearing those nerdy glasses in your pocket, and you’re blind as shit and you think you see someone you know, yet you don’t know for sure. Keep walking, don’t stare. Lock your head in a straight general direction and then you use your “DART EYES” in the direction of the person in question.
Okay, I got really bored for some reason and started to google the keyword “fart” in the search box. Found a couple things, a few people lighting their farts on fire, people farting on people’s faces, you know the usual. I know I’m sorry it had to come to this too. But who doesn’t like to listen to a fart every now and then.
Due to the buttload of comments I get, I’m have no choice, but to make sure people have to register and be logged in or someshiz like that. I don’t know how that works, so… yeah. So if you don’t want to register, just send me the comment through with your mind using telekinesis, pushing it through the internet. I’m sorry spammers, but you’re just going to have to register in order to comment. I know, the few fans of this blog just had to ruin it for everyone. You have them to thank. I just can’t please everyone you know.
Lately, I’ve had the urge to watch the weirdest movies. Like the other day, I decided to watch Pollyanna. What’s even scarier is that I own the movie. I’m losing it, I guess?
It’s really late right now. I really want to go outside and eat my mini powdered donuts (yes, mini ones! omg!!!1111!!!1!1roxorz!111!). But since it’s so dark out, I’m not sure, it’s the best idea to eat in the dark. I’m all for more protein, but not in the form of bugs disguised as sprinkles.
Okay, I’m must leave and see where I can get mosquito bites in the most oddest places.
My father scheduled an appointment for me for the dentist. I know, it's sad that he must do it. Well, otherwise, I won't do it. The dentist is just one of those places that creeps me out.
Visit went fine. Dentist said, if I don't look into getting my wisdoms pulled, he'll still be my friend. w00tness! Let's see, what else…. Oh, yeah. I bit some people. Just the fingers, they know they liked it. I made it seem like a mistake. Hannibal Lecter would be proud. Right now, I'm eating chocolate cover peanuts, and I don't feel guilty about it either.
Peace my reader(s).
I was standing in the aisle of an airplane waiting to get off. And someone opens one of the overhead compartments, and it hits me on the side of my head. I guess that's the silent way of saying "Move.". Looking back, that hurt like son of a bitch.
The End
